Being Intentional: 4 Things I’m Leaving in 2017

The Reflection

Happy Monday, I hope everyone’s January has started off strong! I totally meant to make a post about this earlier, but it took some thought to narrow down my focus of the new year.

After some reflection, I realized that a lot of my 2018 goals require being very intentional about my day to day life. What I’ve learned through personal development is that everything we do must be with intention, or we aren’t living with purpose, therefore making us feel like we’re running on auto-pilot every day.

When thinking about how I can live with more intention in 2018, I naturally had to think about what I’m leaving behind in 2017. As creatures of habits, it can be so easy to not stop and think about the people and things in our lives that are no long serving us. Especially when it feels comfortable to stay stuck with the same routines that we’re so used to.

Being someone who loves routine and is naturally resistant to change, I definitely believe that there is something to be said about changing up your routines in all areas of your life from your mornings, your workouts, and eating habits so that your body/mind doesn’t get bored or unmotivated. We need challenges every once in a while, how else would we grow! This back and forth action of creating routines but then spicing them up every now and then really helps me stay motivated and live more freely. And this also includes weeding out the things and people that don’t help us move in the right direction of inner peace and change.

The List

With that being said, here are 4 major things that I will be leaving behind, that no longer (or never did) serve me, and prohibit me from living intentionally. I’m also including some things that I’m replacing this left behind habits. My hope is that they’ll help you reflect on your own life and habits that keep you from living your best self every day!

1. Self-limiting Beliefs

Leave behind: Self-limiting Beliefs – This is HUGE! While I know it might be a process to train my mind to stop its old, no longer self-serving habits, the things we tell ourselves on a daily basis can be so toxic and damaging to us without us even being consciously aware it. Have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror and said something like, “Wow, you’ve gained some weight, you’ve lost muscle, you really need to get back in the gym”. Like, would you ever make a comment to someone else like that OUTLOUD to their face?!

Or do you have a lot of reactions to yourself that start with the words or phrases, “I can’t”, “I should”, “I suck at”, “I always” or “I’m the worst”? By saying these things, you’re subconsciously telling yourself that you are incapable or less than someone or something else. Stop that. You are so capable of anything your lil heart desires, you just have to tell yourself that you are in order for it to become true.

Replace With: Daily Affirmations – Our beliefs about ourselves and the things we tell ourselves may not be true, but if we act like they are, they are your reality. To combat this habit, we have to speak what we want to believe and deserve into existence, and daily affirmations are a great way to do this. These are short messages of words that you need to hear the most. Imagine what your best friend would tell you as a pep-talk, this is probably what you want to put into your affirmations! Write your affirmations based off of your self-limiting beliefs.

For example, a self-limiting belief of mine is that I am bad at being disciplined, and therefore I’ll never be able to lose the weight I want to lose. To combat this, a daily affirmation of mine is I deserve to be healthy, I choose healthy habits to feel good, happy, and to live at my highest self for my wellbeing and others. Instead of focusing on the negative thought patterns I’m used to, I’m trying to change the focus to the positive things that happen when I choose healthier habits.

You don’t have to write them down in a special journal every day, but I definitely recommend writing them down somewhere you’ll see them at least once a day. On sticky-notes in your bathroom, on your mirror, in your phone on a note, etc. Also, repeat your affirmations outloud to yourself, maybe when you’re getting ready for the day, in your car, under your breathe while you’re walking, etc. This is a trick that life coach and entrepreneur Tony Robbins recommends, and it might feel silly to do this at first, but I swear it fills your heart up with so much gratitude and confidence! The more you repeat these words, the more you’ll rewire your brain to believe them, and the quicker they will be your reality. Below are some of my other affirmations I’ve written down (excuse the handwriting!):

2. The Scale

Leave BehindThe scale – For far too long, I’ve measured my fitness journey based off of the number on the scale, and this is something I need to officially leave behind. My weight fluctuates very easily, so there will be weeks that I see that I’ve lost 2 pounds, then the next week, have gained 3 pounds, and my whole confidence is shot. Then I start spiraling down into a deep dark whole of self-pity and harmful negative thoughts about my worth.

That ONE number makes me want to give up on trying to reach my fitness goals. The reality is, so many factors could be contributing to the number on the scale: The water you’ve consumed, your muscle gain, your indigestion, etc. It can be a good measure of progress for some people, but for me, it does more harm than it does good. So, I’m done measuring my progress with numbers.

Replace With: Intuition & Awareness – This includes how my clothes fit, pictures of me before I got back on my health track, and how I FEEL. Since dealing with emotional eating issues, I’ve become the biggest advocate for intuitive eating. This means listening to your body and eating when you’re hungry, satisfying your cravings, etc. It’s an act of self-love to stop thinking about my worth and health in terms of pounds and inches lost, and start thinking about it in terms of how I feel and gratitude for all that my body does for me. This all goes back to those affirmations!

3. Grudges

Leave Behind: Grudges – 2017 was a huge learning year for me in terms of the negativity, sadness, and anger I hold inside from people that have wronged me. Whether you carry negative feelings towards an old friend or towards family members, those feelings keep you from being present and from being the person you want to be. No, it’s not your fault that they messed up, but it *is* your responsibility to change how you react towards the situation.

Replace With: Forgiveness & Gratitude – Often, those who’ve wronged you need your love more than they need your hate. They may not even know that you still feel hurt or wronged, therefore, you’re the only person allowing yourself to feel negative. Instead, try to think about these people as human beings who’ve made mistakes, and their wronging you is an indication of their lack of personal development or a result of they themselves being wronged in the past. This could be a time to open up a line of communication with this person, or it could simply mean personal reflection about them. You don’t have to make up and be best friends with these people, but try reframe your energy towards them; be thankful for the opportunity they’ve given you to learn and grow.

4. Labels

Leave Behind: Labels – I’ve never been one to CONSCIOUSLY place labels on things or people, but I’ve noticed the anxiety I feel when I pressure myself to place labels on myself. For example, my last post was about my plant-based experience. I felt pressured to call myself vegan, when in reality, all I want to focus on is experimenting with what makes me feel at my optimal health while being conscious about the world around me.

Replace With: Confidence – This is something I work on every day, and hope to keep strengthening through my vulnerability with you guys. I’m learning to truly not care about what other people say and think about me; your identity is whatever YOU say it is. There are always going to be judgmental haters out there, but things in life shift all the time and some things just shouldn’t and can’t be limited to one word or label. One day you could be Democrat, and the next day you might learn about another party that aligns with your values and become Republican. The universe is always in fluctuation, especially as we learn more about the world. We just have to stay true to ourselves throughout it. Whoever you are, just be unapologetically yourself!

With love,

 

Carly Marie

 

 

 

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